My couch mate

Apologies for my absence here lately—after writing February’s newsletter, I crawled onto the couch and pulled a blanket over my head, figuratively speaking…mostly. I continued doing the necessary things to keep my home and our lives running, but any creative work, with words or art, has been largely absent. I’ve needed—and taken—some downtime with no expectations. There *may* have been napping involved.

Where is my Year of the Fire Horse energy, hmm? Up and galloped away without me, apparently.

Anyway, this post is to let you know that I am:

1. Alive.

2. Possibly coming out of my recent funk (?). Jury is still out, but there are some promising signs of life.

During the past couple of weeks, I took some time to mend and tend—the phrase I’m using in place of a word of the year in 2026. As I explained in January’s Happy Little Thoughts newsletter:

“I chose this combination because while I have come a long way in dealing with the losses and griefs of the past few years, I still feel tender and vulnerable, as if any setback could send me back to darkness. I’m not ready to make ambitious plans, but I am ready to take steps forward. I am on the mend, but could use some further tending. I’m not exactly broken, but I’m not exactly whole.” 

The last couple of weeks have felt like much-needed mending. Sometimes the best way for a wound to heal is to leave it alone and not mess with it. Getting extra sleep when you’re sick allows your body to do its healing work. Psychic wounds are no different.

In other news, we’re gearing up for another home renovation, this time in our kitchen and spare bathroom. It shouldn’t take as much time or be as all-consuming as the main bathroom reno, but I will have a bunch of decisions to make and contractors to coordinate in the next couple of months. Hoping for as good an outcome as the bathroom!

What have you been up to lately?

Erkut2 via Pixabay

Recently my social media has been filled with images of flaming steeds like the one above and posts about what what to expect in the Year of the Fire Horse.

The what, now?

On Feb. 17, the Lunar New Year ushered in the Year of the Fire Horse. According to the Chinese zodiac, each year is associated with one of 12 animals and five elements which cycle together. Each combination comes around every 60 years; the last Fire Horse year occurred in 1966. Horse years generally express energy, independence, ambition, and forward movement. The “fire” aspect intensifies those qualities. 

The name is thrilling—if a little scary. A Fire Horse year can be a time of “intensity, decisive action and excitement—or chaos.” As someone who’s spent time around horses, I can vouch for the fact that horses definitely call out those qualities! (It seems unfair that I’m entering the Year of the Horse without my own dear Tank. I miss his powerful-yet-peaceful presence.)

Harnessing Fire Horse energy

I love the idea of moving forward. I’m ready to leave behind the stress and loss of the past few years and embrace new adventures and experiences. I’m ready to feel energized rather than drained, excited about experiencing more freedom, and making progress on goals and projects both old and new. I would LOVE to spend the next 12 months full of bold confidence and inspiration. As one post I saw said, “Horse years pull life forward….They are known for clarity after long periods of confusion.” Bring it on!

At the same time, I know myself. Too rapid a pace or taking on too much at once will prove overwhelming. I’m not naturally a “fiery” personality, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I function best when I combine periods of rest and relaxation with more active times.  Still, I hope to harness Fire Horse energy (pun intended) to break free of what’s holding me back and stimulate forward motion. 

Even if you don’t celebrate the traditions of Lunar New Year, it’s still fun to reflect on how the energy and qualities of the Fire Horse might play out over the course of the coming year.

What do you hope the Year of the Fire Horse brings into your life?

Photo by Brandon Griggs on Unsplash

I’m on a field trip today! My husband and I are going to the Florida State Fair, where we plan to look at cool stuff, eat stupid foods, and NOT make any large impulse purchases (which we have been known to do at past state fairs…). For your reading enjoyment, here are some links I’ve found interesting lately:

I’m loving this guide to exploring a more analog life. 

When you want to step away from your phone: “27 Things That Feel Better Than Scrolling Social Media.” 

Aging isn’t the enemy: “There’s a difference between trying to look young and choosing to feel alive. The first is fear-based. The second is life-based.” 

I want to try so many of these. 

What to do instead of venting/ranting. 

Everyone needs a grandma to turn to. 

What is discernment, and how do we rebuild it?

Move your life forward with these “10 Hard Things to Start Doing for Yourself (Before It’s Too Late).”

And still more advice on living an analog life:

Photo by Aung Soe Min on Unsplash

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”

—Martin Luther King Jr.

“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”

― Mother Teresa

This post started out as a way to explore love in all its guises, in honor of Valentine’s Day. But I can’t remember a time when more hate was on display. How do I write about love when the daily barrage of images and stories of needless cruelty makes my heart sick? When I feel helpless and totally inadequate to affect change, even if I knew the exact right thing to do or say?

Catching Happiness is meant to be a haven of peace and uplifting thoughts, so I cling to the words of Mother Theresa and Martin Luther King Jr., above, and hope it is enough. Since I want to add more kindness and light to public discourse, this post is about focusing on love even—maybe especially—in a time of anger. 

What do you love?

Focusing on love can begin simply. Start by asking yourself, what do you love? Your family? Your friends? Your job?  What activities do you love? What media do you love—which books, music, movies?

If you love something, LOVE it. Don’t be embarrassed, or hold back your enthusiasm. The world is in sore need of more enthusiastic love!

Lavish love on those you live with, including your pets. Family members we live with are often the ones we take for granted most.

Whatever you love, spend more time with it and share it with others. Invite someone to an activity you enjoy, or teach someone how to do the thing you love. Get together with others to “parallel play”—each bringing something you love to do. I like the idea of donating money to a cause that helps others enjoy what you love. For me, that includes donating to organizations that help animals, provide art supplies for Kyiv’s children, or get books to kids. 

Love yourself

What do you love about yourself physically, mentally, emotionally? Maybe you’re the person who throws the best parties or offers a listening ear. Maybe you’re the quiet, smart one who helps others shine. We all have strengths and good points. Remember and appreciate yours. Show yourself true care and kindness.

When love is hard

Next, we move on to love that feels harder. It’s easy to love people, animals, and things that bring us pleasure. It gets stickier when faced with people or organizations you fundamentally disagree with, and some things are so unconscionable that they should be hated. I certainly wrestle with this. The best I can think of is to set boundaries, retain your values, and try not to hate other people. Maybe just not hating is love?

Keep looking for love

In a time of anger and turmoil, keep looking for love, because it’s on display, too. I’m so touched by the monks walking for peace, accompanied by their mascot, Aloka, for example. We can do our part to demonstrate love, as Mother Theresa said, by doing small things with great love: cook a delicious meal for your family, shovel a snow-covered walkway for a neighbor, call a friend just to see how they’re doing. Even a gesture as small as smiling and looking someone in the eye when they greet you can feel loving in this world of cell phone absorption. I love the idea of spending more time focusing on expressions of love—by ourselves and others.

Loving actions can feel risky, and it’s true that people can try to take advantage of us, or ridicule us for our efforts. That’s on them—we don’t have control over how someone else receives our actions. We can only keep trying to put into the world the love we want to see there.

What are some small, loving things you’ve heard about recently? 

*Choler: irascibility; anger; wrath; irritability. With apologies to Gabriel García Márquez.

Photo by Håkon Grimstad on Unsplash

“In our lives, change is unavoidable, loss is unavoidable. In the adaptability and ease with which we experience change, lies our happiness and freedom.”

—Buddha

Photo by YY TEOH on Unsplash

Just as I was thinking about what projects and goals I want to take on next, I heard about Tiny Experiments: How to Live Freely in a Goal-Obsessed World by Anne-Laure Le Cunff. Described as “the antidote to obsessing over goals,” the book intrigued me, so I checked it out from my library. 

I’ve become frustrated with my method of setting goals—I set them, work on them for a while, get distracted by something new (or a crisis) and too often I don’t find the process to be enjoyable or even effective. Couple that with all the life changes I’ve experienced in the last few years, and I feel somewhat adrift. What do I even want to do anymore? How do I figure that out?

Tiny Experiments has some ideas.

A different way to look at goals

Le Cunff is a neuroscientist, entrepreneur, and the creator of the Ness Labs newsletter. Tiny Experiments is described as a reframing of the common approach to setting goals, as well as a guide to help you: 

Instead of randomly choosing a goal to pursue, or going after what other people want you to do, Le Cunff describes a whole process that leads up to creating your tiny experiment. She first encourages readers to start by looking at their lives the way an anthropologist would. She writes, “There is no need for fancy tools or scientific equipment. Simply create a new note on your phone so you can jot down thoughts as you go about your day. Call it ‘Field Notes’ or another title that feels playful or meaningful. Then, whenever something crosses your mind, write a time stamp and a few words.”

You might record insights (moments of curiosity, random thoughts, new ideas, questions), energy (shifts throughout the day, what gives you energy or drains it), mood (emotions before and after an experience), encounters (social interactions and connections, and any insights or feelings that come from them). From these observations, you can learn what brings you joy, what drains you, what you want more of, what you want less of. You may see patterns, persistent challenges, points of curiosity.

Once you’ve made your observations, you might then ask a question. Here’s an example from the book: 

Observation: I feel anxious in the morning.

Follow up your observation with a question: How can I feel more grounded before going to work?

Next comes your hypothesis: Meditation might help regulate my emotions.

From there, design a tiny experiment, which begins with what Ness calls a pact: “I will [action] for [duration].” Durations can vary, with some being as short as 10 days, to others lasting three months or more. A pact should be purposeful, actionable, continuous, and trackable: “I will use my meditation app for five minutes before I go to work for the next 10 days.”

This approach focuses on outputs, something you have control over, rather than outcomes, which you likely do not.

If you’re not sure what your pact should be, think tiny. What would you be able to do on your worst day?

You can choose any number of tiny experiments, becoming the scientist of your own life. 

Favorite concepts

There’s a lot of thought-provoking information in Tiny Experiments, starting with the idea of living experimentally. Other topics I found especially interesting include procrastination and what it can teach you, and how thinking about thinking (metacognition) can improve both your experimental choices and understanding of the results.

Confession: I have yet to finalize any goals for the year, or even for the next few months. However, I am likely to commit to a few tiny experiments—living with curiosity and a spirit of experimentation.

I found Tiny Experiments both philosophical and practical, and I’m still thinking about what I read. If you’re interested in living a full life, but you’re turned off by the culture of bigger, better, more and constant striving, you might find Le Cunff’s approach helpful and more appealing.

What tiny experiments are calling to you?

Photo by Elena Kloppenburg on Unsplash

Adulting is hard.

Work is never-ending, bills need to be paid every month, the news constantly bombards us with distressing images, and what is that new pain in your knee?

While large-scale adventures such as going on a trip or achieving a major goal can boost happiness, these big things don’t come around as often as our daily, weekly, or monthly practices and experiences. That’s why in 2026 I’m going to lean hard on ordinary joys.

This applies to both things I do for fun and things I need to do to contribute to my household and keep our lives running. If I have to do it anyway, why not make it more fun?

• Find the perfect cup for my coffee or tea.
• When I indulge in the treat of my choice, choose something really good rather than mindlessly eating straight from the container.
• Write with the perfect pen on the perfect piece of paper.
• Scent my home with an essential oil diffuser, candle, or room spray.
• Make reading or watching a movie or TV show an event—curl up under a cozy throw, pop some popcorn, put away my phone and concentrate on one thing at a time.

In other words, putting a bit more thought and effort into the ordinary raises a simple pleasure to another level. As Melissa of Julia’s Bookbag Substack wrote, “if you can find a petite joy of some kind…LEAN INTO IT.” 

Ordinary joys

Here are five ordinary joys I’m leaning into this year:

The happiness jar. This was a fun way to focus on and record happy little things as well as what I’m grateful for, so I’m resurrecting the practice. 

Organizing my home. We’ve lived here for a year, so now I have a better idea of how this house functions. I’m reevaluating our belongings, which includes getting rid of things I don’t need, replacing things that need updating, and organizing it all so that it functions well. What’s joyful about this? I finally have both the time and money to focus on this area of life, one that will benefit us all. It feels good when everything functions smoothly, we have what we need, and we’re not constantly reacting to crises.

Reading. I read quickly, and I read a lot. In 2026, I want to make this even more of a joyful practice so I’m going to keep a more extensive reading journal. I’ve been tracking certain aspects of my reading, but I want to expand that. I’m currently deciding between a commercially made reading journal or one I make myself. (Any recommendations?)

Improving my cooking skills and adding new recipes to my repertoire. I’m not in love with cooking like some people are, but I have to do it to keep myself and my family fed. We’re getting bored with what I’ve been making, and I want to take another step towards a healthier eating pattern. I plan to sift through my recipes, try some new dishes, and generally improve my experience in the kitchen. This may also include some new tools to make this easier and more enjoyable, and it definitely includes listening to music, audiobooks, or podcasts while I cook!

Prettifying my planner. Even though I don’t go as far as some planner aficionados, I add washi tape and stickers and occasionally other ephemera into my planner. It makes something I use every day a little more fun. This year I’m allowing myself some small purchases to round out my existing collection of planner/art journaling stuff.  

Elevating the everyday

A new year is a good time to evaluate what’s working in your life and what isn’t. How can you change or adjust your usual routines, habits, and everyday practices to make them more enjoyable and satisfying? We can’t control everything about our lives, but we can make efforts to invite in more joy, satisfaction, wonder, and delight.

How do you make the everyday more joyful? Please share in the comments below.

For more ideas on elevating the everyday, check out Ingrid Fetell Lee’s Joyful or any of Alexandra Stoddard’s books.  

Watching the sun set on 2025  Photo by Marta Sitkowska on Unsplash

’Tis the time of the yearly recap, the year-in-review post, and a look back at 2025’s highs and lows. Sort of the Christmas letter of the blogging world! Wait, don’t click away—I promise this won’t be a recitation of accomplishments that makes you feel bad about yourself. Quite the opposite.

Some people have long lists of goals and accomplishments to share in their recap posts. Not me, at least not this year. Mainly because I didn’t set any major goals in 2025. Basically, I just wanted to get unpacked and settled, and allow myself to recover from the multiple stresses of the past two years. At the beginning of 2025, I was simply too burned out to set any goals or take on any projects. It felt really, really weird. And it feels weird to not have much to show for 2025, which was mostly a quieter, less stressful year, with one big exception. 

Tending the soil

As I wrote in “You Cannot Always Be Harvesting”: “Just as in gardening, in writing, in other creative endeavors—even in life itself, there must be times of planting, feeding, nurturing, even lying fallow.” 

I would call 2025 a year of preparing the soil. Digging out the rocks, adding compost, and yes, allowing some areas to lie fallow. Much of my time and energy was consumed by unpacking and getting settled after our move, and organizing and supervising multiple home projects. I was also responsible for prepping and maintaining our old home while it was being shown.

While 2025’s harvest wasn’t particularly impressive, I can see a few tender shoots pushing through the soil. Smaller accomplishments I can build on in the coming year.

I didn’t take any big trips, but I did go on a beach weekend getaway with my husband, our first in literally years.

I didn’t immerse myself in art journaling, but I did resume regular sketching in my France sketchbook, in person and virtually.

I didn’t “get in shape,” but I did start a new at-home workout plan to get into the habit of doing something physical nearly every day. I wanted to get this habit in place before a new year started, and so far, I’ve been mostly sticking with it.

I tried to hold on to my word of the year, ease, through all the ups and downs of 2025, which was not easy, especially when I wound up immersed in grief, again, with the loss of my horse. 

I still pursued simple pleasures and everyday adventures, and I posted more regularly on Catching Happiness, which always makes me happy. Not a flashy year, 2025, but a solid one.

Hopes for 2026

What’s ahead for 2026? I feel more grounded, less scattered, and more capable of dreaming and planning. Grief is still with me (I suspect it always will be), but it’s a passenger—it’s not driving the bus. I do plan to set some specific goals for 2026, though I’m not completely sure what they are yet. I’m planning to use the time between Christmas and New Year’s Day to reflect and come up with some possibilities. I’ll likely turn to Susannah Conway’s Unravel Your Year or Jamie Varon’s Year in Review to continue reviewing 2025 and get a start on planning 2026. (Both are free, and I have no affiliation with them—I just appreciate their work.) 

As always, thank you for sharing another year with me and Catching Happiness. May the last week of 2025 be filled with much joy and fun plans for the future!

What have been some of the highlights of your year? Any special plans for 2026?

Getting ready for holiday fun!

Last year at this time, we were unpacking after our move and were still recovering from Hurricane Milton. I couldn’t think about winter fun or hosting Christmas without bursting into tears. This year, I’m looking forward to it! I’m also looking forward to experiencing more fun in general…at least until the next home renovation project starts. 

But before I get to winter fun, here’s a quick review of my fall fun list. I was able to check off most of the items:

Put together a fall themed jigsaw puzzle like this one. Finished.

Enjoy watching Lightning hockey and Buccaneers football on TV. I like sports and use them to bond with family members. I’m excited that I can finally watch Lightning games after being unable to for a couple of years since the team changed the company that airs their games locally.  Yes! Go Bolts and Bucs!

I forgot all about the Hillsborough County Fair, and I still haven’t managed persimmon cookies. However, I did bake pumpkin bread and pumpkin scones.

After watching planner videos, I abandoned the one I was planning to buy because I fell in love with the cover of this planner. One of my past favorites came from Archer & Olive, so I expect to love using this one.

Enjoy the annual The Girl Next Door fall extravaganza podcast. These two are so much fun to listen to, and I love their annual look at all things fall. Done.

Ease back into visits to the barn. No horse can ever replace Tank, but I still love horses and am lucky enough to have access to them through my friend who owns the barn where Tank lived. I want to start going there now and then to get my horse fix. Resuming regular visits to the barn has been hard, but I’m sticking with it.

I’ve ordered the photos for my album of special Tank photos, but haven’t yet put it together.

Continue and expand my art education and practice through regular sketching, art journaling, and using the art instruction books I have. I want to do artsy things most days of the week. I am doing some art, just not as much as I want to do. A work in progress.

Participate in Positively Present’s annual Gratitude Challenge (link is to last year’s challenge). I participated as many days as I could. Not as many as I would have liked, but oh, well. 

I didn’t read much from my fall reading list, just The Thirteenth Tale, by Diana Setterfield, and I’ve started The Small and the Mighty, by Sharon McMahon. I’m still waiting for my turn with the new Thursday Murder Club mystery, The Impossible Fortune.

I didn’t get around to reading  The Accidental Alchemist by Gigi Pandan, Lauryn Harper Falls Apart, by Shauna Robinson, or September, by Rosamunde Pilcher. I also didn’t get around to Keys to Drawing, by Bert Dodson, or Carolly Erickson’s To the Scaffold: The Life of Marie Antoinette. They’re all still on the TBR list for someday!

On to holiday/winter fun

Host Christmas for our local family.

I’ve got another puzzle lined up to start after Christmas.

Brunch at Oxford Exchange with M. A holiday tradition.

Bake molasses sugar cookies to eat and give as gifts.

I want to take some field trips, maybe to The Book Rescuers and/or The Paperback Exchange, and this citrus U-Pick farm.

Continue making friends with new horses at my old barn, taking advantage of our nice winter weather.

Visit Bok Tower Gardens again, hopefully before the “Dream Weaver: Tales from the Trees” event finishes. 

Hopefully, this is just the start of winter fun. The future also holds some travel planning, working around another major home renovation we want to do in 2026.

What winter fun do you have planned?

Photo by Kira auf der Heide on Unsplash

I love giving gifts. It’s fun to think about what my friends and family enjoy doing, or would love to have but wouldn’t buy for themselves. Finding something the recipient will really love brings me great joy.

But giving gifts is not always about things, or even experiences. Instead of a list of stuff to buy, here are four gifts that cost nothing at all and take up no room (these gifts relate to how we treat others, but we can offer them to ourselves, too):

1. Time. We’re all so busy that it’s easy to get caught up in what we have to do. Make sure spending time with friends and family makes our to-do list. The next time a friend wants to get together for lunch or a parent asks us to come for a visit, make it happen. Zig Ziglar was right when he wrote, “Spend time with those you love. One of these days you will say either, ‘I wish I had’ or ‘I’m glad I did.’”

2. Attention. Somehow our world of constant online connection has made us more disconnected than ever. We can give the gift of attention by putting our phones away, looking others in the eye, and listening to what they’re saying without interrupting or trying to hurry them along.

3. Kindness. It’s really not that difficult to be kind. All it takes is a little self-control, a little putting-ourselves-in-others’-shoes. We can start by thinking before we speak (or type). (Click here to read “10 Ways to Spread Kindness.”) 

4. Patience. Yesterday in the grocery store parking lot, I saw a guy honk at the car in front of him because the driver didn’t immediately pull forward the second my foot left the crosswalk. Don’t be that guy. Take a breath, slow down, realize we’re all dealing with our own challenges and being impatient only makes us all more frustrated.

I know this is a frustrating, anxious, difficult time to be alive. Let’s try to make it better by giving these gifts to our loved ones—and everyone else—this holiday season.

Photo by Adi Goldstein on Unsplash

In the whirlwind that was November, I failed to mention a milestone: Catching Happiness’ 16^th anniversary! Sixteen years is an odd milestone to highlight, but last year’s 15^th anniversary came and went unnoticed because I was so completely immersed in both hurricane cleanup and moving/selling our house. 

During the past 16 years and 3,000+ posts, I’ve experienced and shared many highs and lows, simple pleasures and everyday adventures, and I’ve learned a ton about happiness in general, as well as what makes me personally happy. In my very first post, I wrote: “What I hope to do is add a little to the world’s store of positive things: information, beauty, entertainment… I’ll try to balance posts that will help you get to know me, with posts that (hopefully) help you learn something new, make you smile or say, ‘I didn’t know that.’”

Through all these years, my purpose has never changed, and I’m proud of the body of work stored on the pages of Catching Happiness.

So in no particular order, here are 16 things I’ve learned from studying and writing about happiness (click links to see posts I’ve written related to these lessons):

1. It’s OK to be happy…even if others aren’t. 

2. Sometimes happiness doesn’t “feel” happy. Sometimes you have to endure discomfort or make sacrifices for happiness in the future or to do what you believe is right. (See next lesson.)

3. Single-mindedly pursuing feeling happy isn’t the goal. That can actually make you unhappy. 

4. Despite number 3, there are things you can do to make it more likely you’ll be happy. You can set yourself up for a better chance at happiness. 

5. You can get better at happiness by practicing. 

6. Happiness is individual—what makes you happy might not make me happy, and vice versa.

7. You can simultaneously experience happiness and [insert negative emotion, such as grief, anger, and so on]. Two things can be true. 

8. The goal isn’t to avoid negative emotions at all costs, but to provide a foundation of happiness that supports you through hard times. 

9. Making others happy makes you happy. Making yourself happy makes others happy. 

10. We don’t have enough fun. 

11. Experiencing deep sadness can expand your capacity for happiness. 

12. The most important factor for happiness is cultivating good relationships. 

13. The term “happiness” encompasses a number of definitions and nuances. 

14. You don’t have to pursue extraordinary experiences to feel happy—much happiness comes from the simple and ordinary.

15. Sometimes, happiness is a choice. 

16. Happiness sometimes involves forgetting and letting go.

A lot has changed in my life since I started Catching Happiness, but I still love thinking and learning about ways to live a happier, more satisfying life—and sharing what I find with you. Big thanks to all of you who spend your precious time with me—I appreciate your comments more than you know! 

Photo by Jovan Vasiljević on Unsplash

“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.”

—G.K. Chesterton

Done!

Earlier this week I was surprised to realize that Thanksgiving is next week. OH. That means we’re just a week (or so) away from November being over. Here’s what’s been happening, Chez Catching Happiness.

Bathroom reno

The bathroom renovation is done (see above)! All that remains are a few odds and ends like hanging towel bars and pictures, and choosing some new decorative pieces to complete the space. It’s so beautiful and tranquil and definitely worth the weeks of chaos. It makes me happy every time I go in there. 

Now I’m sorting through everything we pulled out of the bathroom while the reno was taking place, putting things away and getting rid of yet more stuff. How many ratty old towels does a person need? It feels great to get our bedroom and closet back to normal after using them to store all things bathroom-related while the work was going on.

Gratitude Challenge

I started the Gratitude Challenge with a bang, posting nearly every day…but then bathroom chaos moved into overdrive and I got sick with a cold, and posting daily felt like Too Much. I missed some great prompts, so as I get back on track, I hope to mix in a couple of my favorites that I missed. There are still nine days left in November to refocus on gratitude. 

(Not) filling the void

After nearly three months without Tank, I haven’t found anything to truly fill the void—which doesn’t surprise me. I’m still missing him, grieving for the loss of his companionship and the peace and joy I found at the barn with horses and horse people. I’ve been to the barn a couple of times, but of course it’s still more heartbreaking than happy at this point. I really do miss being around horses, though, even if they’re not mine, and I’m making plans to go back regularly and befriend a few new residents there. I didn’t stop loving horses with Tank’s loss, and I don’t want to squander the horse connections I still have. Plus, the barn owner is my friend, and she’s so busy I won’t ever see her if I don’t go to the barn! 

What’s been happening in your life in November?

Photo by Donald Giannatti on Unsplash

“I don't have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness - it’s right in front of me if I’m paying attention and practicing gratitude.”—Brene Brown

Despite the current chaos in my life—or perhaps because of it?—I decided to join in Positively Present’s annual Gratitude Challenge again. I’ve participated in some fashion every year since 2014, but the past couple of years, my posting has been erratic. This year I want to post more consistently, and so far, I’ve posted a picture and short reflection on Instagram every day. 

After this many years of participating, it’s challenging to find a fresh way of talking about what I’m grateful for. It’s not that I’m not grateful…it just feels like I’ve been saying the same thing over and over, because the things I’m most deeply grateful for don’t change. I don’t want to sound like I’m just parroting what I’ve said before, so I’m trying to think more deeply about each prompt. Even when I fall short of my desired originality or depth of thought, I remember that the words aren’t the most important thing (a hard admission for a writer): the gratitude is. And I welcome the chance to actively focus on what I’m grateful for.

If you want to participate, click here to read Positively Present’s prompts. You don’t need to post your thoughts publicly to benefit, but it is fun to see what everyone else shares (if you do share on social media, use #gratitude30 and tag me so I won’t miss your posts! I’m @kathyjohn335 on IG). You can find my posts on Instagram, and I will run a round-up of my favorites here on Catching Happiness at the end of the month or the beginning of December. 

Until then, what are you grateful for this week?

Everything knocked down

Last Monday, we started a complete main bathroom renovation, which means I won’t be able to indulge in hot bubble baths before bed (one of my favorite simple pleasures), and my most private spaces, my bedroom and bathroom, have been invaded by strangers. My dog doesn’t know what to think (she needs to bark a lot, but then maybe lick everyone???), and my peaceful days haven’t been very peaceful. The renovation is necessary (we had a leak inside a wall and the old tub was a death trap), and it will give us the chance to update the space and make it just what we want.  It’s going to be beautiful, but the process is messy, noisy, and disruptive. That’s what it takes to make a BIG change.

As you know, I’m a fan of baby steps to get where you want to go, but sometimes you have to knock everything down and start from scratch. 

Renovating a bathroom is not unlike renovating a life.

Right now, I’m standing in the rubble of my previous life as well as the rubble of my bathroom. I’ve racked up a lot of losses and big changes over the past few years, and a couple of those losses have impacted my identity—who I see myself as. I’m no longer a horse owner (though I still consider myself a horsewoman). I recently lost my freelance business’s last paying client (though I also still consider myself a writer). I moved from my home of 28 years into a much smaller place—no longer can we accommodate multiple overnight guests and big family get-togethers. Our hosting experiences will have to look different.

It’s a lot to absorb and perhaps I shouldn’t feel surprised that I don’t know where I want to go from here while feeling distressed by all the demolition! 

Unseen work

A lot of the work being done on the bathroom, such as plumbing and electrical, is essential but won’t be visible to the eye once the project is finished. Careful attention to the unseen and unglamorous details is necessary if you want the result to function well in the long term. It doesn’t matter how pretty your tile is if you have to rip it out to repair a leak or an electrical problem. I think of that the same way I think of the internal work I’m doing with myself. I’m currently in a place of reevaluation. Again. What do I want to do with my time? How can I best use the resources I have? And I can’t believe I’m asking this again, but who do I want to be?

And no matter how impatient I am to try out my new bathroom, I have to remember that big overhauls take time. Even when you dread living through the mess and inconvenience, it takes the time it takes, and rushing will only cause problems. If I dive into new commitments without the necessary foundational work, I may regret rushing into something that won’t be a good fit.

It also comforts me to realize that even when you do knock everything down and start over, the entire change doesn’t happen all at once. It occurs over the course of weeks or months and through many tiny decisions (my beloved baby steps again). A lot of thinking through choices happens, and little details get ironed out. Taking time to be thoughtful about these choices now will bring me happiness in years to come. Just as taking time to ponder my future direction may help ensure that it’s one I’m happy with for the long haul.

How can it be wonderful?

Sometimes the remodeling of a life comes about like the remodeling of a bathroom: because of an unexpected and/or unwanted event, like a leak in the wall. When you have to fix one thing, you may stop and look at everything. Is this the time to change it all up? How can it be wonderful, not just functional or patched together? Yes, you’ll have limits of time and money, but what is actually feasible in the space? In your life? Perhaps now is the time to dare to think bigger and better.

I’ll probably have a new bathroom before I have the answers to these questions, but at least I’ve started asking them.

Any big changes going on in your life? Drop a comment below if you want to share!

Photo by Svitlana on Unsplash

I’ve spent less time than usual online lately (unless you count shopping for bathroom fixtures—we’re renovating our main bathroom), but I do have a few little online treats for you today. Hope you find something here that brightens your day or makes you think (in a positive way)! Get cozy and dive in. 

Click here to learn how you can change your life (or at least make a few little changes) before 2026. 

Support your mental health with these simple pleasures. 

Thoughtful list of “10 Things We’ll Regret When We’re Older.” 

Since we’re entering “cozy season” soon (I hope), check out “This Is What “Cozy” Looks Like Around the World.” As the article says, “Seeing ‘coziness’ take on so many different forms shows this concept’s more about a mindset than an aesthetic.” 

I like Morgan Harper Nichols’ take on “creating an archive” rather than “getting inspired.” 

I’m technically a little older (ahem) than “midlife,” but I still feel like I’m learning these habits. 

I absolutely feel the pressure described below in “The Tension Between Rest and Living Fully” (one of my favorite quotes: “A full life isn’t the same as a full calendar.”)

Happy Friday, everyone!

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

It might seem strange that I love fall so much since I’ve lived my entire life in states (California, Florida) that don’t have significant changes during that season. I trace that infatuation to my eight-year-old self’s astonishment when I saw trees decked out in bright yellows and reds while visiting my grandmother in Virginia one October. I instantly fell in love. I’ve been in love ever since. Crisp air, colorful leaves, a season of harvest and gratitude—what’s not to love? 

So how does a Florida girl make it feel like fall? By using the five senses to manufacture it.

Fall and the five senses

Maybe in Florida we don’t have the quintessential fall sight of color-changing leaves, but there are changes in the slant of the light. We look outside and say, “It looks like fall.” Other ways to focus on the sense of sight include watching movies set in the fall (vicarious leaf peeping!), decorating the house with fall-themed items, doing a fall jigsaw puzzle, or going to a pumpkin patch to sketch or just enjoy the fall decorations.

Fall scents include burning a candle or diffusing essential oils with fragrances like cinnamon, apple, nutmeg, or pumpkin. Baking fall treats like pumpkin bread or apple cider doughnuts can also make my house smell like fall.

What does fall sound like? In some places, the sound of rain falling or the wind blowing sounds like fall. That’s more a summer thing for us, so I’ve lately been playing cozy ambience music videos on YouTube. Click here and here for a couple of my recent favorites. 

Tastes of the season include the ubiquitous pumpkin spice latte, and the aforementioned fall baked goods, but also how about soups or chili? It will soon be cool enough (fingers crossed) for these types of foods.

Fall touches I’m looking forward to are a fuzzy blanket to curl up under, and definitely the feel of cool, dry air from the first cold front. I can’t wait!

The fall fun list

Another way I welcome fall is by planning out specific activities to enjoy during the fall season, from now until Dec. 21 when winter officially starts. I’m not a Halloween Girl and I don’t like scary stuff, so my fall fun doesn’t involve haunted houses, horror movies, or anything too dark, but if you like that, go for it! My husband always enjoys the expanded scary movie content on TV during October. Here are some fall fun things I’m looking forward to (a few of these items are not directly fall-related, but I want to do them during the fall season):

Put together a fall themed jigsaw puzzle like this one. 

Enjoy watching Lightning hockey and Buccaneers football on TV. I like sports and use them to bond with family members. I’m excited that I can finally watch Lightning games after being unable to for a couple of years since the team changed the company that airs their games locally.  

Attend the Hillsborough County Fair. In all my 30+ years of living in Hillsborough County, I’ve only gone to this fair twice. Since the larger state fair is near us, we often don’t think of attending the county fair.

Bake fall treats. Last year I didn’t get around to making persimmon cookies, so I’m going to try again this year. I also plan to bake at least one loaf of pumpkin bread.

Choose a 2026 planner. I watch planner videos because it’s fun, but I also get helpful knowledge to help me make my choice. Since I use my planner every day, and take a lot of pleasure in doing so, making a good choice makes a difference and I like to take my time and enjoy the process. 

Enjoy the annual The Girl Next Door fall extravaganza podcast. These two are so much fun to listen to, and I love their annual look at all things fall. 

Ease back into visits to the barn. No horse can ever replace Tank, but I still love horses and am lucky enough to have access to them through my friend who owns the barn where Tank lived. I want to start going there now and then to get my horse fix.

Create a small photo album of special Tank photos. A thoughtful friend gave me an album for this purpose, and I’ll enjoy choosing photos to represent our time together. (I’ve already compiled a short video montage of photos for Instagram.) 

Continue and expand my art education and practice through regular sketching, art journaling, and using the art instruction books I have. I want to do artsy things most days of the week.

Participate in Positively Present’s annual Gratitude Challenge (link is to last year’s challenge). 

Read from my fall reading list (see below).

(For previous years’ fall fun lists, click here and here.) 

Did you say fall reading list?

I’ve never made a fall reading list before, but they seem to be popping up all over. Why not join in? My list is a combination of “books that feel like fall,” including Gothic or dark academia, as well as non-fiction that helps me learn something (going back to school vibes). I’m also including books from my TBR shelf I’d like to read before the end of the year. (TBR shelf books marked with *)

I thought The Accidental Alchemist by Gigi Pandian, described as a “supernatural cozy” sounded both fun and fallish. 

A new Thursday Murder Club mystery? Yes, please! The Impossible Fortune, by Richard Osman, has 147 people ahead of me waiting for it so it might be a while before I get my hands on it. 

The Thirteenth Tale, Diana Setterfield. Described as “a cozy and literary modern day Gothic mystery with a side of family dysfunction.”  

Lauryn Harper Falls Apart, Shauna Robinson. This sounds like a cozy comfort book, and the apple festival sounds very fall-like. 

*September, Rosamunde Pilcher. I’ve liked other Pilcher novels, and this one sounds like a good choice for fall reading.

*The Small and the Mighty, Sharon McMahon. From “America’s favorite government teacher,” this book tells the stories of 12 “ordinary Americans whose courage formed the character of our country.” 

*Keys to Drawing, Bert Dodson. 

*To the Scaffold: The Life of Marie Antoinette, Carolly Erickson. 

Looking at these lists, I’d better get busy! There’s a lot of fun to be had this fall, and I’m definitely looking for ways to have fun.

What fun things are you planning to do this fall? Any fall reading plans? Do share in the comments below!

Fall reading lists to check out:

Your Fall Reading List Is Here—20 Books We Can’t Stop Talking About 

The PERFECT Autumn Vibes Reading List For 2025

31 spooky (but not too scary) books for your fall reading list

20 Dark Academia novels for moody fall reading