Photo courtesy Sammy Sander via Pixabay

I lived for many years in the area of Southern California that is currently burning. So far, to my knowledge and with one exception, my friends are safe and have not had to evacuate. The exception? A college friend lost her family home of 33 years in the Eaton fire.

Recovering after a hurricane is terrible—but recovering after a fire? I imagine it’s worse. With a hurricane, unless you’re in the very worst of it, your house is likely still standing and you can salvage personal belongings. With a fire like the ones raging now, all that’s left is ash.

I was talking about the fires with a friend, and she mentioned Robert Frost’s poem, Fire and Ice, in passing. I looked it up, and in a few short lines, using the metaphors of fire and ice, he notes the danger of destruction we face from both desire and hate. Here is Frost’s poem:

Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I’ve tasted of desire

I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that for destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice.

While many, many people are helping survivors and firefighters, there are always the few who lead with hate. Whose first response is to point fingers, spread misinformation, and react with glee to the misfortune of others. These reactions just add to the pain and confusion. Almost every situation is more complicated and nuanced than we can easily comprehend.

The scale of the disasters the U.S. has faced this year is mind-blowing. I find myself grieving and overwhelmed, wondering what I can do. It’s too easy to do nothing, when what you can do seems insufficient. I recently came upon a saying, credited to Andy Stanley, that has helped me:

Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone.

I can be kind to those I come into contact with every day. (This means online as well as in person!)

I can look for the positive rather than focus on the negative.

And while I can’t go to L.A. and distribute food and clothes, I can donate money to organizations who are on the ground helping out. It might not be much, but maybe it can help one person. Helping one person is better than helping no one.

If you would like to help, click here for the Los Angeles Times’ guide to helping victims of the Southern California fires. 

To double check the legitimacy of charitable organizations, visit the Charity Navigator website. 

My friend has a GoFundMe page to help her family rebuild their home, which you can find here.

My friend Kerri organized a GoFundMe page for her friend who also lost everything, here. 

Calendar courtesy of Action for Happiness

Just wanted to pop in to wish you all a happy New Year, and share a few resources to help 2025 get off to a positive start. I have no affiliation with these people or organizations, but I have enjoyed and benefited from their offerings in the past. Here’s to a happier new year!

Check out 10 Days of Happiness—a free online program to boost your wellbeing. 

Click here to download your own Action for Happiness Happier January calendar (see image above). 

Design your year with Gretchen Rubin. 

Instead of charging into 2025, why not enjoy a “Gentle January”? This really appeals to me right now as I sit in my house full of boxes! (But hurry, because the live event is tomorrow, Jan. 2. Replay is available, but I think you need to be signed up in order to receive it.)

Remind yourself that good things happen, even when times feel hard. (Many of the most positive things are happening in countries other than my own. It’s helpful to remember that eliminating suffering anywhere is a good thing.) 

Wishing you all a joyful 2025. Now back to unpacking…

I will return to writing regular blog posts, but today is not that day. We finally have a move date and it is CLOSE. Next Friday, in fact. So I’ve doubled down on wrapping up home improvement projects and cleaning at our current home, as well as packing and purging, and transporting car loads of our belongings to the new place.

And the county just picked up the enormous mound of tree debris (see below) that has been sitting in front of our house since Milton blew through, so now we have to clean up what was left behind. I’m developing quite the set of upper body muscles because of all the raking, sweeping, lifting, and carrying.

The pile--it was larger than it appears in this photo

Even though the last two months have been an unbelievably wild ride, I’m enjoying many of the aspects of this move. This is not to say that I haven’t crashed and burned, made plenty of mistakes, and felt overwhelmed countless times—just that I feel like I’ve learned how to enjoy the rewarding moments during a project of this magnitude. I’ve become a lot more willing to accept imperfection in the cause of getting things done. While my husband might not agree, I feel like I’m more flexible—something I’ve always struggled with. I’ve allowed myself to feel the moments of sadness over leaving this very well-loved home, as well as the excitement of moving to a new-to-us place that is already starting to feel like home. (Once we’re settled, I’ll share a few pictures.)

Christmas isn’t exactly cancelled, but it won’t be the celebratory occasion it usually is in our family for obvious reasons. There may be a little holiday decorating if there’s time. I may or may not get around to making my traditional molasses sugar cookies; there will probably not be any Christmas cards this year.

But it won’t be long before we can start settling in to our new home, taking time to put our favorite things in new places, helping the pets get used to the move.

And when that time comes, I hope to get back to regular posts on Catching Happiness. I’ve learned so much over the past couple of years, and some of the lessons are worth exploring more deeply and sharing with others.

Wishing you the happiest of holiday seasons, filled with simple pleasures and everyday adventures!

Me, looking for my latest to-do list Image courtesy Ivana Tomášková from Pixabay

Hurricane Milton recovery has slowed our progress in prepping our house to sell, but we’re still lumbering along. I’ve had very little time for writing, and any thinking time I have fills up with to-do lists and more to-do lists. But I am still capturing simple pleasures where I can, still reading, still surfing the internet. I’m sooooo looking forward to having a “normal” to-do list rather than a “sell my house and move” to-do list. (And I will strangle my husband if he asks me what I did today one more time.)

I may be living in chaos right now, but here are a few islands of calm and positivity I’ve found online recently. Enjoy!

I’m immersed in home-related decisions so I loved the info in “What Makes a Home Feel Good?”  

I am ABSOLUTELY going to try “Living Inside a Movie…” What a fun way to find and enjoy simple pleasures! (I’m currently living in The Money Pit, but someday I hope to be living in Something’s Gotta Give. What movie are you living in?) 

Click here for a dose of animal cuteness. 

I love stories of ordinary people making life better, like this one. 

Have you heard of a “dopamine menu”? “A dopamine menu is a curated list of pleasurable, healthy habits and activities that naturally elevate your dopamine levels, boosting happiness, motivation, and focus,” according to this article. Jessica McCabe, the creator of the YouTube channel “How To ADHD” and author of How to ADHD: An Insider’s Guide to Working With Your Brain (Not Against It) originated the concept. A dopamine menu, like a restaurant menu, can be divided into sections including appetizers (quick ways to boost good feelings), entrees (longer duration activities that might take some planning), and sides (pleasurable activities done along with tasks that are necessary but not enjoyable). Sounds a lot like a more detailed categorization of simple pleasures and everyday adventures! 

Poor sleep definitely affects my mood, and over the past few years I’ve struggled to get a solid night’s rest. I had fallen into some of these “8 Sneaky Habits that Are Destroying Your Sleep.” After making some changes, I’m sleeping better. 

I loved the tips in “How to Start Assuming the Best in People,” from Steven Collis, a law professor at the University of Texas and author of Habits of a Peacemaker: 10 Habits to Change Our Potentially Toxic Conversations into Healthy Dialogues. We’re often too quick to judge people and situations as all good or all bad without allowing for nuance. 

Florida doesn’t have changing leaves in the fall, so I went here for my fall leaf fix. Sigh. 

Have a great weekend!