Everything knocked down

Last Monday, we started a complete main bathroom renovation, which means I won’t be able to indulge in hot bubble baths before bed (one of my favorite simple pleasures), and my most private spaces, my bedroom and bathroom, have been invaded by strangers. My dog doesn’t know what to think (she needs to bark a lot, but then maybe lick everyone???), and my peaceful days haven’t been very peaceful. The renovation is necessary (we had a leak inside a wall and the old tub was a death trap), and it will give us the chance to update the space and make it just what we want.  It’s going to be beautiful, but the process is messy, noisy, and disruptive. That’s what it takes to make a BIG change.

As you know, I’m a fan of baby steps to get where you want to go, but sometimes you have to knock everything down and start from scratch. 

Renovating a bathroom is not unlike renovating a life.

Right now, I’m standing in the rubble of my previous life as well as the rubble of my bathroom. I’ve racked up a lot of losses and big changes over the past few years, and a couple of those losses have impacted my identity—who I see myself as. I’m no longer a horse owner (though I still consider myself a horsewoman). I recently lost my freelance business’s last paying client (though I also still consider myself a writer). I moved from my home of 28 years into a much smaller place—no longer can we accommodate multiple overnight guests and big family get-togethers. Our hosting experiences will have to look different.

It’s a lot to absorb and perhaps I shouldn’t feel surprised that I don’t know where I want to go from here while feeling distressed by all the demolition! 

Unseen work

A lot of the work being done on the bathroom, such as plumbing and electrical, is essential but won’t be visible to the eye once the project is finished. Careful attention to the unseen and unglamorous details is necessary if you want the result to function well in the long term. It doesn’t matter how pretty your tile is if you have to rip it out to repair a leak or an electrical problem. I think of that the same way I think of the internal work I’m doing with myself. I’m currently in a place of reevaluation. Again. What do I want to do with my time? How can I best use the resources I have? And I can’t believe I’m asking this again, but who do I want to be?

And no matter how impatient I am to try out my new bathroom, I have to remember that big overhauls take time. Even when you dread living through the mess and inconvenience, it takes the time it takes, and rushing will only cause problems. If I dive into new commitments without the necessary foundational work, I may regret rushing into something that won’t be a good fit.

It also comforts me to realize that even when you do knock everything down and start over, the entire change doesn’t happen all at once. It occurs over the course of weeks or months and through many tiny decisions (my beloved baby steps again). A lot of thinking through choices happens, and little details get ironed out. Taking time to be thoughtful about these choices now will bring me happiness in years to come. Just as taking time to ponder my future direction may help ensure that it’s one I’m happy with for the long haul.

How can it be wonderful?

Sometimes the remodeling of a life comes about like the remodeling of a bathroom: because of an unexpected and/or unwanted event, like a leak in the wall. When you have to fix one thing, you may stop and look at everything. Is this the time to change it all up? How can it be wonderful, not just functional or patched together? Yes, you’ll have limits of time and money, but what is actually feasible in the space? In your life? Perhaps now is the time to dare to think bigger and better.

I’ll probably have a new bathroom before I have the answers to these questions, but at least I’ve started asking them.

Any big changes going on in your life? Drop a comment below if you want to share!

Photo by Svitlana on Unsplash

I’ve spent less time than usual online lately (unless you count shopping for bathroom fixtures—we’re renovating our main bathroom), but I do have a few little online treats for you today. Hope you find something here that brightens your day or makes you think (in a positive way)! Get cozy and dive in. 

Click here to learn how you can change your life (or at least make a few little changes) before 2026. 

Support your mental health with these simple pleasures. 

Thoughtful list of “10 Things We’ll Regret When We’re Older.” 

Since we’re entering “cozy season” soon (I hope), check out “This Is What “Cozy” Looks Like Around the World.” As the article says, “Seeing ‘coziness’ take on so many different forms shows this concept’s more about a mindset than an aesthetic.” 

I like Morgan Harper Nichols’ take on “creating an archive” rather than “getting inspired.” 

I’m technically a little older (ahem) than “midlife,” but I still feel like I’m learning these habits. 

I absolutely feel the pressure described below in “The Tension Between Rest and Living Fully” (one of my favorite quotes: “A full life isn’t the same as a full calendar.”)

Happy Friday, everyone!

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

It might seem strange that I love fall so much since I’ve lived my entire life in states (California, Florida) that don’t have significant changes during that season. I trace that infatuation to my eight-year-old self’s astonishment when I saw trees decked out in bright yellows and reds while visiting my grandmother in Virginia one October. I instantly fell in love. I’ve been in love ever since. Crisp air, colorful leaves, a season of harvest and gratitude—what’s not to love? 

So how does a Florida girl make it feel like fall? By using the five senses to manufacture it.

Fall and the five senses

Maybe in Florida we don’t have the quintessential fall sight of color-changing leaves, but there are changes in the slant of the light. We look outside and say, “It looks like fall.” Other ways to focus on the sense of sight include watching movies set in the fall (vicarious leaf peeping!), decorating the house with fall-themed items, doing a fall jigsaw puzzle, or going to a pumpkin patch to sketch or just enjoy the fall decorations.

Fall scents include burning a candle or diffusing essential oils with fragrances like cinnamon, apple, nutmeg, or pumpkin. Baking fall treats like pumpkin bread or apple cider doughnuts can also make my house smell like fall.

What does fall sound like? In some places, the sound of rain falling or the wind blowing sounds like fall. That’s more a summer thing for us, so I’ve lately been playing cozy ambience music videos on YouTube. Click here and here for a couple of my recent favorites. 

Tastes of the season include the ubiquitous pumpkin spice latte, and the aforementioned fall baked goods, but also how about soups or chili? It will soon be cool enough (fingers crossed) for these types of foods.

Fall touches I’m looking forward to are a fuzzy blanket to curl up under, and definitely the feel of cool, dry air from the first cold front. I can’t wait!

The fall fun list

Another way I welcome fall is by planning out specific activities to enjoy during the fall season, from now until Dec. 21 when winter officially starts. I’m not a Halloween Girl and I don’t like scary stuff, so my fall fun doesn’t involve haunted houses, horror movies, or anything too dark, but if you like that, go for it! My husband always enjoys the expanded scary movie content on TV during October. Here are some fall fun things I’m looking forward to (a few of these items are not directly fall-related, but I want to do them during the fall season):

Put together a fall themed jigsaw puzzle like this one. 

Enjoy watching Lightning hockey and Buccaneers football on TV. I like sports and use them to bond with family members. I’m excited that I can finally watch Lightning games after being unable to for a couple of years since the team changed the company that airs their games locally.  

Attend the Hillsborough County Fair. In all my 30+ years of living in Hillsborough County, I’ve only gone to this fair twice. Since the larger state fair is near us, we often don’t think of attending the county fair.

Bake fall treats. Last year I didn’t get around to making persimmon cookies, so I’m going to try again this year. I also plan to bake at least one loaf of pumpkin bread.

Choose a 2026 planner. I watch planner videos because it’s fun, but I also get helpful knowledge to help me make my choice. Since I use my planner every day, and take a lot of pleasure in doing so, making a good choice makes a difference and I like to take my time and enjoy the process. 

Enjoy the annual The Girl Next Door fall extravaganza podcast. These two are so much fun to listen to, and I love their annual look at all things fall. 

Ease back into visits to the barn. No horse can ever replace Tank, but I still love horses and am lucky enough to have access to them through my friend who owns the barn where Tank lived. I want to start going there now and then to get my horse fix.

Create a small photo album of special Tank photos. A thoughtful friend gave me an album for this purpose, and I’ll enjoy choosing photos to represent our time together. (I’ve already compiled a short video montage of photos for Instagram.) 

Continue and expand my art education and practice through regular sketching, art journaling, and using the art instruction books I have. I want to do artsy things most days of the week.

Participate in Positively Present’s annual Gratitude Challenge (link is to last year’s challenge). 

Read from my fall reading list (see below).

(For previous years’ fall fun lists, click here and here.) 

Did you say fall reading list?

I’ve never made a fall reading list before, but they seem to be popping up all over. Why not join in? My list is a combination of “books that feel like fall,” including Gothic or dark academia, as well as non-fiction that helps me learn something (going back to school vibes). I’m also including books from my TBR shelf I’d like to read before the end of the year. (TBR shelf books marked with *)

I thought The Accidental Alchemist by Gigi Pandian, described as a “supernatural cozy” sounded both fun and fallish. 

A new Thursday Murder Club mystery? Yes, please! The Impossible Fortune, by Richard Osman, has 147 people ahead of me waiting for it so it might be a while before I get my hands on it. 

The Thirteenth Tale, Diana Setterfield. Described as “a cozy and literary modern day Gothic mystery with a side of family dysfunction.”  

Lauryn Harper Falls Apart, Shauna Robinson. This sounds like a cozy comfort book, and the apple festival sounds very fall-like. 

*September, Rosamunde Pilcher. I’ve liked other Pilcher novels, and this one sounds like a good choice for fall reading.

*The Small and the Mighty, Sharon McMahon. From “America’s favorite government teacher,” this book tells the stories of 12 “ordinary Americans whose courage formed the character of our country.” 

*Keys to Drawing, Bert Dodson. 

*To the Scaffold: The Life of Marie Antoinette, Carolly Erickson. 

Looking at these lists, I’d better get busy! There’s a lot of fun to be had this fall, and I’m definitely looking for ways to have fun.

What fun things are you planning to do this fall? Any fall reading plans? Do share in the comments below!

Fall reading lists to check out:

Your Fall Reading List Is Here—20 Books We Can’t Stop Talking About 

The PERFECT Autumn Vibes Reading List For 2025

31 spooky (but not too scary) books for your fall reading list

20 Dark Academia novels for moody fall reading

Photo by mosi knife on Unsplash

Watch Mission: Impossible—The Final Reckoning in the theater with my husband. 

Take an in-person yoga class. 

Stay at the beach for the weekend with my husband—we’ve been trying to do this for a couple of years, but I’m confident we’ll actually get there this summer. When you actually stay at the beach, you can get out early before it’s as hot as the surface of the sun, or watch the sunset at night, then go back into air-conditioned comfort.

Make key lime pie ice cream.

Do at least one jigsaw puzzle.

Try some new recipes because I’m sick of what I make for dinner. Though I wouldn’t normally class this as “fun,” I’m trying to find ways to make feeding ourselves more enjoyable.

Celebrate my father-in-law’s 90^th birthday!

Check out our new neighborhood pool. Maybe with a cold drink and a book if they have umbrellas (I can’t remember if they do). (They do.)

I did get together with friends, ate summer fruit like crazy, and, of course, and read up a storm. Which brings me to…

What I read

I’m very happy with how I did with my summer reading list, finishing Kristin Lavransdatter and several other books (TBR shelf selections marked with *):

*Kristin Lavransdatter, Sigrid Unset. This is a chunky book I’ve wanted to read for a while, and I bought a copy so I wouldn’t have to worry about library due dates. I’m going to start it soon, and if I don’t like it, I’ll put it aside. If I do like it, it might take me all summer to read!

*Death and the Dutch Uncle, Patricia Moyes. A book series I enjoy that the library doesn’t have. I’ve collected most of my copies from Paperback Swap. 

Native Nations: A Millennium in North America, Kathleen DuVal. I have a growing interest in learning about the United States’ indigenous people, and this book won the 2025 Pulitzer Prize for history (tied with Edda L. Fields-Black’s COMBEE: Harriet Tubman, the Combahee River Raid, and Black Freedom During the Civil War). 

Run for the Hills, Kevin Wilson. It’s described as “a touching and generous romp of a novel,” which sounds perfect for summer reading. 

Ordinary Time: Lessons Learned While Staying Put, Annie B. Jones. I’m all for honoring the ordinary. 

Heartwood, Amity Gage. Suspense on the Appalachian Trail. This sounds so good! I’m number 69 on the hold list at the library, but hopefully it will come in before the summer ends.

*Daisy Miller and/or Washington Square, Henry James (both books are in the edition I have). According to Goodreads, “Each work weaves an intricate tale of marriage, money, and manners.” 

 Travels with My Aunt, Graham Greene. I’ve not read anything by Graham Greene, and this sounded interesting. 

*Small Victories, Anne Lamott. Lamott’s essays are always thought-provoking and often hilarious. I haven’t read this collection, and I found it in my library’s book store for $2. 

*Bruno, Chief of Police, Martin Walker. Because WHY NOT start a new mystery series?? This one is set in France, so oui, s’il vous plait.

Coming soon: fall fun

While we’re still waiting for our first cold front, I’m determined to find ways to mark the beginning of fall. In Florida, fall is the most fleeting of seasons, but I’ve got a fall fun list in the works to make the most of it. I’ll post it next week (hopefully), along with my first ever fall reading list!

What fun plans do you have for fall?

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been overwhelmed by the messages, cards, and even gifts people have sent me following Tank’s death. Not only did these show kindness, but also understanding of how big a role he played in my life, how deeply intertwined into my identity his presence was. So THANK YOU to everyone who has reached out. During a very sad time, these gestures have made me feel seen and cared for.

I went to the barn for the first time after on Wednesday, to catch up with my friend who owns it and to drop off supplements and feed I had stored at home. I have other horse items to give away but I’m not ready yet to part with them. It’s not like holding on to Tank’s blanket will bring him back, I know. But it also makes the loss even more final. Every time I let go of a Tank thing, it feels like tearing off a fragment of my heart. There’s only so much I can lose at one time.

The past few years have been a season of loss for me. My dad in 2018, then my mother-in-law and mom in 2023. I’ve had more practice handling grief than I want, and one of the things I’ve learned is that you have to allow it to rise to the surface, you have to feel it for it to pass. You can’t let fear of the pain keep you from letting it in. You can manage it, put boundaries on it, find ways to support yourself through it…but you have to feel it.

I hate that.

I hate that I have a handful of articles in a file folder labeled “grief” and an Instagram collection called “healing.” I’m sad that I need these things, and yet, why wouldn’t I? No one is immune to loss, pain, suffering, or struggle. While we may not “like” going through any of these experiences (I surely don’t), we can emerge finer, kinder versions of ourselves because of them. We appreciate the joys and pleasures of life more because we’ve experienced loss and pain. We know the ebbs and flows of experience. We appreciate happiness more after suffering through misery. And, hopefully, we hold greater patience and kindness for others, remembering that we don’t know what they’re privately struggling with. Several people I’ve talked with recently have shared their experiences with depression, grief, and other heavy emotions—so if you’re going through something hard right now, you’re most definitely not alone.

I don’t want you to think I’m some Pollyanna-ish figure here, happily looking for the silver lining. On Wednesday when I went to the barn, I did the ugly cry again, and spent most of the afternoon on the couch recovering. Sadness still pops up frequently, tears welling in my eyes unexpectedly when a thought takes me by surprise. I still can’t fully take in that he’s gone, and when I have no choice but to recognize that fact, I’m devastated all over again. And his loss reminds me of those other losses, and well, you get the picture. I’ll be walking with grief again for a while.

At the same time, I’m exploring the idea that feeling deep grief also strengthens my ability to feel deep happiness. Exercising my emotional muscles, if you will. And with the clarity that strong emotion sometimes brings, I’ll be reveling in the first hint of cooler weather, the taste of a freshly-baked scone, and how wonderful it feels to sink into a comfortable bed at the end of a tiring day. I’m looking forward to exploring hobbies I’ve neglected (art!) and continuing the process of fully unpacking and settling in to our new home (which I absolutely love). Remembering that nothing and no one lasts forever, I’ll more deeply embrace life’s simple pleasures and everyday adventures, and hopefully, share them with you.  

This is the blog post I’ve been dreading writing. On Monday, Tank sustained an injury he couldn’t come back from, and was peacefully and humanely euthanized at the equine vet hospital. I’m devastated, but also so, so grateful for the privilege of having him in my life for more than 21 years.

I’ve written often about our relationship, life lessons from the barn, and so many everyday adventures and simple pleasures resulting from having this lifelong dream come true. My time with him stretched me in almost every way, but one of the most important ways involved learning to be brave and do what needed to be done. I wasn’t perfect, but I did my best and I have no regrets about our time together. I loved and pampered him, and spent hours just hanging out with him. I studied horse care and horsemanship in order to give him a good life, not only because it was the right thing to do, but because I was so grateful for his presence. It gave me a lot of pleasure to care for him well, even when it became challenging as he aged.

Thinking deep thoughts

I wonder how many hundreds (thousands?) of pounds of carrots I’ve fed him over the last 21 years?!

Having my horse all these years has brought me joy, pain, sweat, and dirt, and involved sacrificing both time and money. I thank my husband for his gracious support of my horse dream. (Neither of us knew it would last for 21+ years and it’s probably better that we didn’t know how big a commitment we were making!) Despite my current grief, I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. Tank was absolutely the best boy, and everyone loved him, vets and farriers included, because he was always gentle and good (unless you tried to hot shoe him, and then he was definitely Not Good.). 

The last photo I took of Tank, after I gave him a shower to cool him off

I feel a little lost without him. I built my weekly schedule around visits to the barn, and suddenly I have time on my hands. It’ll take me a while to get my bearings. My friends and family have been kind and understanding and I’m grateful for that, too. I know eventually it won’t hurt so much, but for now, my heart aches when I remember I won’t be seeing his sweet face looking at me inquisitively, or be able to bury my nose in his neck for that therapeutic horse smell. 

Being Tank’s person changed me for the better and will always remain one of the greatest joys of my life. Even in grief, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the experience.

More Tank content:

Read about how I found Tank here. 

This post includes links to some of my favorite Catching Happiness writings about Tank.

Here is another one of my favorite posts.

I finished reading Kristin Lavransdatter this week. All 1,124 pages of it. 

And I have to say that I truly enjoyed immersing myself for two months in Kristin’s world (14^th century Norway), following her from childhood to old age (50ish!).

I usually read fast. There are so many books I want to read that I tend to gobble them up as quickly as possible. However enjoyable that may be, there are times, maybe more times than I want to admit, when I would benefit from and enjoy slowing down my reading pace. Maybe to savor the images or language, to learn something, or to spend time with characters I like, getting to know them better.

A longer, more complex book naturally makes me slow down. I’d like to intersperse more of these types of books with my lighter (and quicker) reading, but sometimes I’m loathe to commit to a longer book—if I get bogged down, I might not read anything, and that’s unacceptable!

Good reasons to read more slowly

Our culture encourages the fast and the surface, skimming and sound bites rather than in-depth study and understanding. We are drowning in “content,” and not necessarily better off than before the internet and the 24-hour news cycle. I’ve noticed a drop off in my ability to concentrate on longer pieces of writing. Conditioned by social media and blog posts, my ability and patience to read a longer work—online or off—has suffered. Partway through, my attention wanders and I start skimming. I don’t like that.

I also want to read slowly for the sake of pure enjoyment more often. Allow a book to fully sink in before moving on. How many times have I loved a reading experience, and by the end of the year, forgotten the main point of what I read, or at least the details of it? I’m hoping that reading slowly more often will improve my reading comprehension and sustained attention.

My slow reading game plan  

I was able to enjoy Kristin Lavransdatter slowly, while at the same time reading other, lighter books because I made a plan. When I commit to a book I know will take me a while to finish, I know I’ll want to read some of it every day in order not to lose the plot or momentum. Since I also want the freedom to read other things at the same time, I divide the length of the longer or more complex book into the length of time I want to commit to finishing it and come up with a number of pages to read every day. If I read more sometimes, that would be fine and would make up for any days I might not be able to read my page allotment. (I am also willing to abandon books altogether if I find I strongly dislike them. Life’s too short to read books you hate.)

Happily, I loved being immersed in a different place and time. Visiting snowy Norway every day has helped me pass the hot Florida summer more pleasurably. I loved getting to know a character more deeply, in this case, seeing a personality develop over a lifetime. I found peace and comfort when I sank into Kristin’s world every day.

Reading slow and fast

I won’t entirely give up on reading fast. Some books are tasty snacks, meant to be ingested quickly. Much of what I read is strictly for entertainment. But I enjoy knowing that I can commit to a longer or more complex book and still be able to enjoy quicker, easier, and/or more “fun” reads along with that deeper read. It feels good knowing I can stick to a plan and conquer a big book.

What’s next? Right now, I’m reading a few pages a day of Native Nations, and in future, I’d like to tackle a one-chapter-a-day slow read of War and Peace, as mentioned by Laura Vanderkam. I’m happy to have rediscovered how much pleasure there is in a long, slow read.

Do you enjoy reading longer books? What does your reading life look like?

Photo by Stéphan Valentin on Unsplash

Much of the U.S. is sweltering right now, so indoor pursuits sound much more appealing than outdoor ones (though as you read this, I’m at the beach…sweltering). Even though much of the online world is a hot mess too, here are a few interesting and uplifting internet destinations for you to check out.

Visit Action for Happiness for a monthly calendar of daily actions for a happier life. Every month has a different theme.

I’m currently incorporating a few of these suggestions from Courtney Carver’s “7 Simple Shifts to Trade Overwhelm for Joy,” specifically numbers one and three. 

Thanks to Laure Ferlita, I recently discovered Filling the Jars. I especially enjoyed “10 Simple Daily Habits to Start This Summer for a Calm and Soft Life.” Summer in Florida is hard for me; these slow and soft practices are helping me enjoy some things about my least favorite season.

“Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village” made me chuckle. A must-read if you, like me, love a cozy English village mystery. Tip: avoid the village shop. “They sell cheese, stamps, tea, and death.”

The news isn’t all bad. Click here for a roundup of good news stories from around the world. Their newsletter always encourages me.

I found the topic of “psychological minimalism” intriguing since I’ve been known to overthink things as well as become overwhelmed by the onslaught of news, notifications, information, and just plain mental noise.

Even if you don’t consider yourself “creative,” this is an inspiring watch:

Note: Catching Happiness is taking a summer break. See you in a couple of weeks!

Photo by Onur Binay on Unsplash

In December, we bought a robot vacuum. It sat in its box until a few weeks ago because we still had too much stuff sitting on the floor waiting for a permanent home. Then, once we had unpacked and put away those things, I got stuck on naming the vacuum, because I am that (crazy) person.

Initially, I wanted to name it “Rosie,” (or Rosey) after the robot maid on The Jetsons. But Rosie is the most common name for Roombas, something I learned when I looked up “robot vacuum names” (because I am also that crazy person). On that list of names, “Vlad the Inhaler” made me laugh out loud, so Vlad became our Roomba’s name. 

Once Vlad had been christened, we sent him off to map the house before his first job. Vlad bumbled through our rooms, smacking into walls, crawling under furniture, and generally looking like a large, intoxicated hockey puck. This was perfectly normal, according to the operating instructions. (The final map of the house said we have five living rooms and our third bedroom is labeled a bathroom, but oh well.)

I’ve been known to take life lessons from unlikely places (see here and here), and it struck me, as I watched Vlad do his thing, that there are some lessons to be learned from a robot vacuum. 

Life lessons from a robot vacuum

• You can finish a big project by methodically moving through it. Speed is not always the most important thing.
• Looking confused is part of the journey.
• What you’re doing might look odd or confusing to someone else, but you have a plan.
• No one can really tell what you’re doing—or how well you’re doing—it until you're finished.
• If you’re stuck, pause for a moment and get your bearings.
• Sometimes it’s necessary to retrace your steps…but not over and over again. Know when you need help.
• Ask for help. Most likely you’ll get it.
• Even when you do a good job, it won’t be perfect. The people who care about you realize you’re not perfect (nobody is) and will make allowances for you.
• When your battery is low, go home to recharge.

Vlad has been on the job for several weeks now, and in addition to the pleasure of not having to vacuum as much (Vlad is imperfect, after all), it makes me smile just to see his name on the app. Choosing to enjoy the little things and looking for unusual ways to reinforce positive beliefs can help us feel happier. Have you taken any life lessons from an unusual source? Please share!

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

And just like that, here we are smack in the middle of 2025. A good time to review how the year is going—if you have any special goals or plans, how are you progressing? Has this year held any surprises?

I feel a little weird doing a mid-year review because I didn’t set any big personal goals in January that need to be checked on. (Did I? *Checks notes* No, I did not. And that “setting goals by quarter idea? Nope, didn’t do that, either.) Still, I think it will be helpful to review what I have done, and think about what I might like to do during the remainder of the year.

Here’s what I did: Other than the normal tasks of life and a bare minimum of writing, the first six months of 2025 have been devoted to preparing and selling our family home of 28 years, and getting settled in our new home.

That’s it, and that’s OK. Most of my time has gone to coordinating (and helping with) home repairs and remodeling, unpacking, organizing, and simply figuring things out. Even though I love my new home, moving is stressful. It takes an emotional and physical toll. I love to check off goals, but some seasons it’s not possible. My personal projects and goals had to step back while I dealt with the admittedly major projects of selling a house and moving.

Looking back over my calendar I also see plenty of meet-ups with friends, a couple of movies with my husband, regular walks and yoga sessions. I’ve read a lot of good books and seen a favorite author in person. And—control your excitement—I renewed my driver’s license. This has been hanging over my head because I had to appear in person with multiple proofs of my existence so I could become Real I.D. compliant. It was a hassle, but it’s done.

All of this is the stuff of a busy season of normal life. Being able to find satisfaction in it is a wonderful thing. I’m learning that I don’t have to check a flurry of personal projects off a list to feel contentment.

25 in 25

That said, I do enjoy setting goals and accomplishing projects. I’d like to be able to have more to show for 2025 than just getting settled after the move.

While I didn’t lay out a bunch of goals to work towards at the beginning of the year, I did fill out Gretchen Rubin’s “25 in 25” list with a combination of things big and small, fun and tedious, that I’d like to have done by the end of the year. I’ve completed 10 out of my 25, including “Finish Agatha in Order project” and “Design and install a closet system for our bedroom closet.”  I’m 90+ percent done with two more. Not bad, about halfway done at the mid-year mark. 

Word of the year

Ease was and is a great choice to guide me in 2025. It reminds me not to pack too much into my days, weeks, and months. It also encourages me to look for the ease-ful way to approach various challenges. Instead of rushing headlong into whatever-it-is, take a beat to consider what might be the most mental- and physical-energy saving way to proceed. Also consider whether that whatever-it-is is necessary at all. Especially during summer, I’m better off conserving my energy for what is truly important. When I have a choice of activities, I consider which one feels more aligned with ease.

Now what?

Which brings me to what’s next. We’re not done with house stuff (will we ever be?!). There’s a leak in a wall which pushed our prospective bathroom reno higher on the schedule. We need cabinetry installed in our laundry room. My office is still a work in progress, and I still have some sorting and storing to do. My husband and I need to take at least a weekend getaway to completely disconnect from all of the above. I still want to go to California to visit family, but that has been pushed into the fall because of a family member’s surgery.

After so much turmoil over the past couple of years, I want to feel calm, joyful, and at least a little bit in control of my days. I want to be relaxed, but also productive. Maybe that means choosing just one or two goals or projects, rather than 12 which is my usual tendency. Concentrate on the house and on scheduling that weekend getaway.  Fight the urge to commit to more. For July, August, and September, keeping it simple and low-key feels right. October, November, and December will have a different vibe, usually a more energetic one, and I hope and plan to capture that energy.

I share my goals and mid-year reviews here because I think part of a happy life includes, as Gretchen Rubin puts it, an atmosphere of growth. I like sharing progress with you, my online friends, because I hope it sparks ideas for what could add happiness to your life. I share missteps because that’s real life, no matter what social media tells you. Mistakes Will Be Made. We all fall short from time to time, we all sometimes take a different path from the one we thought we’d be on, sometimes on purpose and sometimes because of life being life-y.

If you’d like to share what you’ve been up to so far in 2025, please do so in the comments below. I’d love to hear how it’s going, and what plans you have for the remainder of the year!

Photo by Todd Trapani on Unsplash

“A Night can NEVER defeat the Sunrise.”

—Sumit Sharma

This past week has been the first in months that didn’t contain a huge number of extra “have-tos” on top of my normal activities that keep our lives functioning. I’ve allowed myself to slow down a little…but just a little, because there are sooo many things in progress that need to be moved along now that I only have one house to manage. We’ve lived here six months today (!), and 99 percent of the boxes are unpacked. Some of the remaining boxes are waiting on additional storage we need to add to the house (laundry room cabinets, for example). Not bad, but not finished, either.

Finishing can be hard

I’ve noticed that I have a hard time finishing larger or more complex projects, and unpacking is no different. Sometimes one small hurdle will derail me—it doesn’t have to be a major obstacle or unexpected event, just something that requires extra time or thought. Sometimes it’s decision fatigue. Where should the photo albums go? How about these puzzles? Where will I keep the extra pet food and toys? I’ll get one area of the house unpacked and organized, only to find piles from another part of the house stacking up there while I work on that other area!

So this week I devoted my spare time to finishing as much unpacking as I can. And I’ve discovered that there is definite joy in finishing. It feels so good to walk into my bedroom and no longer have any boxes stacked on the floor, and to be able to actually close the closet door in my office!

A work in progress

This week, not only have I (re)learned how good it feels to finish, I also (re)discovered that finishing often takes a lot less time than I think. Sorting the box of art supplies and putting them into the new storage containers I’d bought probably took less than an hour, for example.

It helped to break things down into small tasks, use a timer, and give myself permission to change activities when decision fatigue began to kick in. I also kept at it all week even when new and necessary projects appeared. I’ve rewarded myself with cold drinks and reading a book, but also with the vision of what it will feel like to be done. Completely unpacked and settled.  I’m not quite there, but getting close.

Closing the tabs in my brain

When too many things are in progress, I joke about having too many tabs open in my brain. I don’t feel internally peaceful when multiple things are undone or in progress. Eventually it’s more uncomfortable to leave things as they are than to actually finish. That’s what this week has been all about: finishing what can be finished.

If you’re not unpacking (lucky you), what projects do you have in the works? Are you making progress or are you stalled? Are you good at starting but not so good at finishing (raises hand)? What step could you take right now to move forward? 

Photo by Anna Demianenko on Unsplash

I know it’s not technically summer yet (it officially begins June 20), but it’s summer in Florida. (It’s almost always summer in Florida, but that’s another story.) I’m bracing myself for getting ready for summer by planning things to look forward to, simple pleasures and everyday adventures to make this season bearable, if not actually happy.

We do summer in Florida the way those who live in cold climates do winter: we spend a lot of time escaping and working around the weather.

We’re not here yet, but it’s only a matter of time:

CleanMemes.com

Summer fun for the weather-impaired

First on my list is: coordinate a California visit to see my aunt, my stepmom…and my mom’s grave.

Watch Mission: Impossible—The Final Reckoning in the theater with my husband. Looking for other movies to see in the theater as well. 

Take an in-person yoga class.

Stay at the beach for the weekend with my husband—we’ve been trying to do this for a couple of years, but I’m confident we’ll actually get there this summer. When you actually stay at the beach, you can get out early before it’s as hot as the surface of the sun, or watch the sunset at night, then go back into air-conditioned comfort.

Make key lime pie ice cream.

Do at least one jigsaw puzzle.

Try some new recipes because I’m sick of what I make for dinner. Though I wouldn’t normally class this as “fun,” I’m trying to find ways to make feeding ourselves more enjoyable.

Rewatch some of our favorite movies on the new TV we bought when we moved.

Celebrate my father-in-law’s 90^th birthday!

Check out our new neighborhood pool. Maybe with a cold drink and a book if they have umbrellas (I can’t remember if they do).

As always, I’ll be getting together with friends, eating summer fruit like crazy, and, of course, reading. Which brings me to…

What I’ll be reading

I finally finished the Agatha in Order project that I started back in August of 2023. I thoroughly enjoyed my leisurely trip through her work, rediscovering favorites, and acknowledging that a few simply didn’t appeal. Now that I’m done with that, I’ve decided it’s time to get a handle on my TBR shelf again. When we moved, I lost the space I used to store my bought-but-as-yet-unread books and let’s just say, my new TBR shelf location is overflowing. Despite the fact that I’ve slowed down new purchases considerably since this post, one of my 25 in 25 goals was to read or otherwise dispose of half of my TBR shelf. I bought these books because I wanted to read them; maybe it’s time to, you know, read them? 

But.                                                                                        

(There’s always a “but.”)

When I looked through my TBR books, I realized many of them are non-fiction, very long, or one of a series that I’m not ready to read yet. I still hope to make some progress.  

Here’s a tentative list of what I want to read this summer in no particular order (TBR shelf selections marked with *):

*Kristin Lavransdatter, Sigrid Unset. This is a chunky book I’ve wanted to read for a while, and I bought a copy so I wouldn’t have to worry about library due dates. I’m going to start it soon, and if I don’t like it, I’ll put it aside. If I do like it, it might take me all summer to read!

*Death and the Dutch Uncle, Patricia Moyes. A book series I enjoy that the library doesn’t have. I’ve collected most of my copies from Paperback Swap. 

Native Nations: A Millennium in North America, Kathleen DuVal. I have a growing interest in learning about the United States’ indigenous people, and this book won the 2025 Pulitzer Prize for history (tied with Edda L. Fields-Black’s COMBEE: Harriet Tubman, the Combahee River Raid, and Black Freedom During the Civil War). 

Run for the Hills, Kevin Wilson. It’s described as “a touching and generous romp of a novel,” which sounds perfect for summer reading. 

Ordinary Time: Lessons Learned While Staying Put, Annie B. Jones. I’m all for honoring the ordinary. 

Heartwood, Amity Gage. Suspense on the Appalachian Trail. This sounds so good! I’m number 69 on the hold list at the library, but hopefully it will come in before the summer ends.

*Daisy Miller and/or Washington Square, Henry James (both books are in the edition I have). According to Goodreads, “Each work weaves an intricate tale of marriage, money, and manners.” 

*Travels with My Aunt, Graham Greene. I’ve not read anything by Graham Greene, and this sounded interesting. 

*Small Victories, Anne Lamott. Lamott’s essays are always thought-provoking and often hilarious. I haven’t read this collection, and I found it in my library’s book store for $2. 

*Bruno, Chief of Police, Martin Walker. Because WHY NOT start a new mystery series?? This one is set in France, so oui, s’il vous plait.

I’m a fairly fast reader, but we’ll see how this goes.

And that’s it so far. I’m not feeling all that ambitious after moving and unpacking. I’d rather relax with a cold drink and a book than do anything. Maybe I need another Summer of Kathy?

What summer fun are you planning this year?

Wow, May sure went by in a flash! Here we are, on the doorstep of June. Of summer. Summer’s not my favorite, but this year I’m really going to make an effort to enjoy it as much as possible. While I’m making up my summer fun and summer reading lists, I hope you enjoy these links I’ve collected recently. 

What makes people flourish? The Global Flourishing Study is an interesting look at how respondents from 22 countries rank their well-being based on six dimensions of a flourishing life.  

I want to travel to Iceland, but after reading this article, maybe I want to move there? 

The book nerd in me enjoyed watching this short video on how to properly break in a new hardcover book so that it’s easier to read and the spine is protected. 

This will surprise no one who loves to read: “Why Reading Is a Form of Therapy.”

Psychologist Rick Hansen has developed a method of building resilience and improving emotional well-being. Read about it in “‘Taking in the good’: A simple way to offset your brain’s negativity bias.” 

Have you heard of “shine theory”? 

Watch this if you’re afraid you’re falling behind:

Happy Friday—and see you in June!

A quick update: the last couple weeks have been a flurry of activity—our previous house was under contract, then it wasn’t. And then it was again. And then it sold.

Since we put it on the market in February, I’ve been going there at least once a week to check on things, run the dishwasher, flush the toilets, pull vines and weeds (etc.) to keep it looking presentable for showings and open houses. Lately, I’ve been going more often because we had some minor repairs to do before the sale and we also wanted to dig up or take cuttings of a few of our favorite plants. This helped me continue to detach emotionally, but it was wearing me out.

Also, we had planned to hire someone to build a built-in cabinet/bookshelf at our new home, and it just so happened that this week he was available to do the project. The unit is gorgeous (see below), but it has been noisy and nuts at times, and difficult for me to concentrate.

Before:

After:

This whole week has been chaos, but we are done with two big things: the sale of our house and the construction of our built-in unit. Two steps forward toward our new life! 

We have a three-day weekend to unpack the final boxes and fill our beautiful shelves. 

So that's what I've been doing lately. What's new with you?