A quick update today: kitchen remodeling is underway! The good news: the kitchen will not take (knock wood) as long as the bathroom to complete. The bad news: it’s really hard to feed yourself without a kitchen sink, dishwasher, and counters. Food prep is tough, and washing dishes in the laundry tub is, shall we say, problematic. We do have use of our stove and oven, which helps. We can cook the food, but cleaning up after is a pain.

Lots of waiting around for contractors to arrive, noise, disruption, mess, and chaos—the animals are handling it better than the humans, probably because their meals aren’t affected.

This project has been hanging over my head for months—I’m excited to see it in progress, and it will be a huge relief to have it finished. We’ve been thrilled with our bathroom renovation, and I think we’re going to be just as happy with our kitchen. We’re not moving plumbing or changing the configuration, but the cabinetry will go almost to the ceiling and there will be corner cabinets instead of dead space. I’m hoping this will solve some of our storage problems—and we’ll be able to unpack the last couple of boxes in the garage!

A tiny sneak peek:

This has been my adventure for the week—what was yours? 

Photo by Shamblen Studios on Unsplash

The advertisements and marketing emails are everywhere: Mother’s Day is coming. And for those of us who no longer have our mothers with us, this can be a painful time of year. Rather than hide from it, I’ve been thinking about what we can do to enjoy the day. Here are four ways we can celebrate Mother’s Day if our moms are no longer with us. 

Celebrate the women in your life who fill a mothering role for you

I’m lucky to have a few cherished older women in my life I still look up to. My mom’s twin sister, my stepmom, and even my high school creative writing teacher who I’ve remained in touch with for 40+ years. These women continue to inspire me and love me unconditionally, and even though I don’t need advice from them very often anymore, I know I could ask them for it and hear something of merit.

Celebrate any new moms you know

In our family, we have two new moms: our niece, Jennifer, and our nephew’s wife, Kelly. Both are navigating the first six months of their new roles, and both are the kind of women I’m proud to call family. Their strength, humor, and love will serve them well as moms. I’m excited to watch a new generation of parents in our family!

Remember with gratitude all you loved about your mom

Until recently, I found it too painful to think much about my mom and our life together. That is slowly changing, and I’m starting to be able to remember fun times we shared, and look back with gratitude for her presence. I so wish she could see our new home and talk over my plans for changes and updates—we both would have enjoyed that immensely!

If you’re a mom, celebrate yourself!

I am a mom, and it’s been one of the most challenging and mind-blowing roles of my life. I made many mistakes (still do) but I’ve loved being a mom and am grateful for the experience. I’m also grateful for the chances for personal growth being a mom provided—I know I’m a better, stronger person because of it. 

Miss you, Mom

I miss my mom, and I know I was lucky to have a caring mother and a good relationship with her—not everyone has that blessing. Whatever your relationship with your mom, good or bad, whether she is present or gone, I hope you have a happy Mother’s Day!

If you feel comfortable, share one happy memory of your mom in the comments!

P.S. If you still have your mom, give her some extra love this year on Mother’s Day!

Photo by Lan Gao on Unsplash

“For is it not possible that middle age can be looked upon as a period of second flowering, second growth, even a kind of second adolescence? It is true that society in general does not help one accept this interpretation of the second half of life. And therefore this period of expanding is often tragically misunderstood. Many people never climb above the plateau of forty-to-fifty. The signs that presage growth, so similar, it seems to me, to those in early adolescence: discontent, restlessness, doubt, despair, longing, are interpreted falsely as signs of decay. In youth one does not as often misinterpret the signs; one accepts them, quite rightly, as growing pains. One takes them seriously, listens to them, follows where they lead. One is afraid. Naturally. Who is not afraid of pure space—that breath-taking empty space of an open door? But despite fear, one goes through to the room beyond.”

—Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gift From the Sea

Photo by Shelley Pauls on Unsplash

A very happy Friday to you! In this edition of Link Love, I share a collection of articles about systems, habits, and beliefs that can help us feel happier—plus a couple of unrelated minor delights. Enjoy!

I love the two-minute system Neil Pasrischa uses when anxiety spikes. Click here to learn more about “Rose, Rose, Thorn, Bud.” 

I’m practicing several of these slow living habits. 

Why does Finland consistently rank as the happiest country in the world? Here are six habits and beliefs that contribute. (I especially found it interesting that “happiness” for Finns is more about contentment and life satisfaction than feelings of “overwhelming happiness.”) 

In the face of setbacks and hard times, how do you keep calm and carry on? Here are some great answers to that question. 

Spending too much time online makes me unhappy, so I’ve been trying to cut down on mindlessly scrolling on my phone. “The Real Secret to Reducing Screen Time” has some helpful suggestions; click through to see the details, but “The real secret to reducing screen time is to shift your focus from controlling your phone to forgetting all about it.” 

Reading is a source of joy for me, but I can get caught up in trying to read more books at the cost of a deeper, more rewarding reading experience. Reading faster doesn’t mean reading better. In “What we lose when we gamify reading,” Marissa Levien discusses how we can take goal setting around reading too far, to our own detriment. 

In February, Larry the cat celebrated 15 years as the British government’s official rodent-catcher and unofficial first feline. His duties include “greeting guests to the house, inspecting security defenses and testing antique furniture for napping quality.” He’s been known to say hello to world leaders and photobomb visitors as they enter the front door of No. 10 Downing Street. 

This is a beautiful version of Elton John’s “Your Song.” 

Have a great weekend!

Peaceful mornings

Watching leaf shadows dance on the walls and floor of my new home office. Photos coming soon when I’m finished with the last bit of unpacking (see below).

Sifting through the last box of research and other files from my old home office, deciding what to keep and what to let go of. 

Office helper

Developing new morning, afternoon, and evening routines to avoid the doomscroll and to fill time I used to spend on Tank. 

Taking Luna on “sniffari” in our yard, since it’s not fenced and she has to stay on leash when outside.

Enjoying quiet instead of comfort TV playing in the background, because it doesn’t hurt as much to think.

Savoring the calm before the kitchen remodeling storm.

Digging deeper into organizing at home and preparing for emergencies (I’m looking at you, hurricane season) so I can be more proactive than reactive.

Watching Lightning hockey—their first Stanley Cup playoff game is this weekend!

Taking hot baths before bed and going to sleep early.

Feeling inspired by the Artemis II astronauts and mission, and loving the beautiful photos from space. 

Reading lots of great books. (Currently: Flashlight, by Susan Choi and Vesper Flights, by Helen Macdonald. These will probably be my two favorites in this month’s Happy Little Thoughts newsletter—subscribe here.)   

It’s such a little, ordinary life, but one filled with delightful moments—simple pleasures and even a few everyday adventures.  I like it like that. I don’t want a loud, public life. I want a quiet, satisfying, gentle one. After a prolonged time of stress, I’m rejoicing in a stretch of peaceful days. I know I’m very lucky that life right now looks pretty good, and I’m grateful for it.

What does life look like for you right now? What’s bringing you delight? What’s challenging you?

Photo by Trent Erwin on Unsplash

During the last few months of 2024 and almost the whole of 2025, I spent all my time randomly ping ponging around, putting out metaphorical fire after fire. These included dealing with the aftermath of a major hurricane, moving, maintaining and selling our family home while not living in it, unpacking, renovations, and the death of my horse. I set no goals (is “surviving” a goal?) and made no real plans for myself, other than trying to get fully unpacked and settled in to our new and smaller home. The entire year of 2025 is basically a blur.

And while 2026 is shaping up to be a much calmer year overall (fingers crossed), I didn’t start it by setting a bunch of big goals for myself. I did fill out a “26 in 26” list, and set a word for the year, a phrase, actually, “mend and tend,” and that has been my focus during the first three months of 2026. 

It feels good to have the breathing room to putter around fixing and cleaning and rearranging. When I got tired, I retreated to the couch. 

And though we’re only into the second quarter of the year, I’m thinking about finishing. Finishing the renovations (kitchen and second bathroom are up next and they’re the last ones), finishing several courses I’ve signed up for but haven’t had the time or mental bandwidth to complete, finishing the unpacking (I only have a box or two left). Even finishing the sketchbook I took to France in 2018! 

It feels like closing tabs in my brain, and that feels good.

You are enough

I still feel the urge to Make Big Plans, but I know they have to be the right ones, ones that come from my heart. I read something in a newsletter from Jenna Kutcher last week that resonated with me:

“What if we just stopped? Like what if the most radical thing we did heading into Q2 wasn’t a new strategy or a rebrand or another launch plan, but a single, quiet decision to stop shrinking, to stop performing wellness and actually live it, to stop building something that looks right and start building something that feels true.

“You don't need a birthday or a milestone or a sign from the universe to give yourself permission to recalibrate. The end of a quarter is enough. This moment is enough. You are enough.”   

What has the first quarter of 2026 been like for you?

Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

Photo by Jon Gibbins on Unsplash

What makes you happy?

Today’s a good day to ponder that, because it’s not only the first day of spring—generally a happy time for most—it’s also the International Day of Happiness. 

Everyone wants to be happy

Happiness is not a small or unimportant thing. Even the United Nations has recognized that happiness is a human right and worth celebrating, and they have proclaimed March 20 the annual International Day of Happiness. This proclamation was intended to remind and encourage governments to consider the value of citizens’ happiness and wellbeing as well as economic opportunity and growth when creating public policy. Sadly, I think we have a long way to go before this is the case, but I appreciate the gesture. 

Social media and happiness

This year’s focus is on happiness and social media. According to U.N. International Day of Happiness partner Action for Happiness, “There’s no one ‘right’ way to use social media, but small, thoughtful choices about how we use it and how we treat each other online can make a real difference.”

I’ve fought my own battles with allowing social media to take up too much time and attention. Too much Instagram (my social media of choice) can definitely affect my happiness, so I appreciated these three suggestions from Action for Happiness to help us build a happier relationship with social media: 

First, choose when and how much time you spend on social media. If you want to spend less time scrolling, create a list of alternate activities, set a timer to limit use, and/or try a “digital sabbath.”

Second, don’t let scrolling social media take the place of in-real-life connection. It’s great to connect with friends and meaningful communities online—just be sure you also make in-person plans, and pick up the phone to call friends and family members when you can.

Third, curate your social media experience to support your wellbeing. Follow positive accounts, share uplifting stories and ideas, and don’t spread misinformation. And always, always be kind and respectful when commenting on other people’s posts.

Stop to appreciate what makes you happy

While social media often doesn’t make us happy, what does? Why not stop today and appreciate what makes you happy? I’ll go first. Things making me happy today include:

• Open windows bringing in fresh air
• Vlad the Inhaler helping me clean the house 
• Meeting a teacher friend for brunch
• Petting my purring cat

It’s impossible to ignore the conflict and suffering taking place in the world—and we shouldn’t ignore it—but let’s not forget what does contribute to happiness and wellbeing, for ourselves and for others. Will my happiness, or yours, hurt anyone? Unlikely. My being a grouchy jerk might, though. If I’m lucky enough to have the choice, I choose happiness. I hope you do, too.  

What’s making you happy today?

 

My couch mate

Apologies for my absence here lately—after writing February’s newsletter, I crawled onto the couch and pulled a blanket over my head, figuratively speaking…mostly. I continued doing the necessary things to keep my home and our lives running, but any creative work, with words or art, has been largely absent. I’ve needed—and taken—some downtime with no expectations. There *may* have been napping involved.

Where is my Year of the Fire Horse energy, hmm? Up and galloped away without me, apparently.

Anyway, this post is to let you know that I am:

1. Alive.

2. Possibly coming out of my recent funk (?). Jury is still out, but there are some promising signs of life.

During the past couple of weeks, I took some time to mend and tend—the phrase I’m using in place of a word of the year in 2026. As I explained in January’s Happy Little Thoughts newsletter:

“I chose this combination because while I have come a long way in dealing with the losses and griefs of the past few years, I still feel tender and vulnerable, as if any setback could send me back to darkness. I’m not ready to make ambitious plans, but I am ready to take steps forward. I am on the mend, but could use some further tending. I’m not exactly broken, but I’m not exactly whole.” 

The last couple of weeks have felt like much-needed mending. Sometimes the best way for a wound to heal is to leave it alone and not mess with it. Getting extra sleep when you’re sick allows your body to do its healing work. Psychic wounds are no different.

In other news, we’re gearing up for another home renovation, this time in our kitchen and spare bathroom. It shouldn’t take as much time or be as all-consuming as the main bathroom reno, but I will have a bunch of decisions to make and contractors to coordinate in the next couple of months. Hoping for as good an outcome as the bathroom!

What have you been up to lately?

Erkut2 via Pixabay

Recently my social media has been filled with images of flaming steeds like the one above and posts about what what to expect in the Year of the Fire Horse.

The what, now?

On Feb. 17, the Lunar New Year ushered in the Year of the Fire Horse. According to the Chinese zodiac, each year is associated with one of 12 animals and five elements which cycle together. Each combination comes around every 60 years; the last Fire Horse year occurred in 1966. Horse years generally express energy, independence, ambition, and forward movement. The “fire” aspect intensifies those qualities. 

The name is thrilling—if a little scary. A Fire Horse year can be a time of “intensity, decisive action and excitement—or chaos.” As someone who’s spent time around horses, I can vouch for the fact that horses definitely call out those qualities! (It seems unfair that I’m entering the Year of the Horse without my own dear Tank. I miss his powerful-yet-peaceful presence.)

Harnessing Fire Horse energy

I love the idea of moving forward. I’m ready to leave behind the stress and loss of the past few years and embrace new adventures and experiences. I’m ready to feel energized rather than drained, excited about experiencing more freedom, and making progress on goals and projects both old and new. I would LOVE to spend the next 12 months full of bold confidence and inspiration. As one post I saw said, “Horse years pull life forward….They are known for clarity after long periods of confusion.” Bring it on!

At the same time, I know myself. Too rapid a pace or taking on too much at once will prove overwhelming. I’m not naturally a “fiery” personality, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I function best when I combine periods of rest and relaxation with more active times.  Still, I hope to harness Fire Horse energy (pun intended) to break free of what’s holding me back and stimulate forward motion. 

Even if you don’t celebrate the traditions of Lunar New Year, it’s still fun to reflect on how the energy and qualities of the Fire Horse might play out over the course of the coming year.

What do you hope the Year of the Fire Horse brings into your life?