Happiness

Are You Mean to Yourself?

May 14, 2018

On the bulletin board next to my desk hangs a sign with the following words:



I’m mean to myself sometimes, and I’m betting you are, too. For instance:

  • When you goof up, do you replay the mistake in your head, over and over again, mentally cringing at your error? Do you think you shouldn’t have made a mistake?
  • When you’re sick, tired, or just not feeling up to par, do you always “power through,” regardless of how you feel? 
  • Does your inner critic receive your full attention and agreement when he/she begins to speak? 
  • Do you practice real self-care on a regular basis? By real self-care, I mean things like eating a healthful diet, sleeping enough, using stress-relief techniques when you’re feeling anxious—generally, just taking care of yourself.
For our own happiness’ sake, I think we should be nicer to ourselves all the time, even when we feel we least deserve it.

A few ways to be nice to yourself include:

Talking to yourself with respect. Reprogram your thoughts. Next time you begin to mentally beat yourself up for a mistake or criticize yourself for some real or imagined failing, STOP. Take a breath. Admit, yes, I made a mistake. I’m human. I will do better next time. I’m doing the best I can. Treat yourself—even in your thoughts—as you would a much-loved friend.

Treating your body lovingly. Feed it well, move it, let it rest. And talk to it nicely. Go slow enough, or take enough breaks during the day, that you can hear what it has to say.

Having more fun! Schedule at least one thing just for fun every day. Working out doesn’t count, unless you do it for fun. Maybe it’s a half hour of reading at lunchtime, a glass of wine with your partner before dinner, or playing a game with a friend online. Whatever simple pleasures make your heart happy.

When you are kinder to yourself, you’ll probably find it easier to cut everyone else some slack as well. We’re all imperfect, we all lose concentration now and then, we—gasp—make mistakes! It’s much easier to be patient and forgiving with others when that’s “where you live,” so to speak.

Being nicer to ourselves is not only a way to feel happier, it is also one way to add to the sum total of kindness and gentleness in the world—something the world desperately needs.

How are you mean to yourself? What can you do today to be nice to yourself?

George Santayana

A Happier State of Mind

May 11, 2018


“To be interested in the changing seasons is…a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring.”
—George Santayana, “Justification of Art”


Beautiful things

Happy Little Things--Beautiful Books

May 07, 2018



I’ve had an influx of beautiful books lately, so I thought I’d share this simple pleasure with you.

I was shopping at Target a couple of weeks ago when this book caught my eye:



First the pretty cover and then the enticing title: A Book That Takes Its Time: An Unhurried Adventure in Creative Mindfulness. I picked it up to flip through and found that each page was unique. Thoughtfully written pieces were interspersed with happy illustrations and interactive goodies, such as tear out “Notecards for your beautiful moments jar.” The clincher that made me drop it into my basket—it is “a flow book.” (Flow is a magazine I’ve heard of but not yet seen in person. Since flow is my word of the year, my reticular activating system is constantly bringing it to my attention!)

I’m taking my time going through this book, savoring the simple pleasures within. On the back cover, it’s described as “A mindfulness retreat between two covers….” It has sections on kindness (to yourself and others), creativity, learning and more, as well as writing prompts, mini-journals, postcards, and decorative papers. I can see it sitting on a coffee table, available to browse through at whim. This was an impulse buy, but well worth the price.

Prudy likes it, too







The other beautiful books came to me by way of a contest! Rizzoli Books sponsored a giveaway on Instagram recently, and I won! The books arrived Friday. They’re all beautiful, and I know I’ll spend many happy hours browsing through them. 




 Two were of particular interest to me: Gardens of Style, by Janelle McCulloch, and Paris in Stride, by Jessie Kanelos Weiner and Sarah Moroz. Janelle writes and photographs the most beautiful books, and I’ve read her blog A Library of Design for several years. I claim her as a blogging acquaintance and hope to meet her someday as she sometimes visits Florida. 

 




Paris in Stride comes at just the right time, as I will be joining Laure Ferlita on her sketching tour in Paris in October! Paris in Stride is subtitled “an insider’s walking guide,” and is arranged by arrondissements, so I think it’s going to be helpful in planning our visit. Plus it’s charmingly illustrated in watercolor! (The books also came with a watercolor of the Eiffel Tour as seen below left.)

 


It will be hard to get my work done with these tempting beauties around!

What happy little things and simple pleasures have you savored lately?






Birds

The Winding Road Comes to an End

May 04, 2018

Gentle readers, let us finish up the Birds and Blooms and Winding Roads trip with some delicious food and a visit to the Mendocino Coast Botanical Gardens. (See part one here, part two here, and part three here.) Click on the photos if you'd like to see them bigger.


The last full day of our trip splurged on breakfast at Circa ’62 at the Inn at Schoolhouse Creek and Spa. I’m glad we didn’t stay there, because I would have found it hard to leave the property. The grounds were lovely:

Circa '62

There were chipmunks!


The food was some of the best I’ve ever eaten—we shared the hard cider French toast and the bacon and mushroom hash.

 

In addition to serving people, they are dog-friendly with a special menu just for their canine guests: the Stop, Drop & Drool menu, and there’s a special room where you can eat with your pet. (Luna would have lost her mind with joy.)


The doggy dining room
If I’m ever in the neighborhood again, you can bet I’ll try to wangle a stay there.

After we waddled walked to our car, we headed just up the road to the Mendocino Coast Botanical Gardens: “47 acres of botanical bliss fronting the Pacific Ocean.” This garden was voted 5th best garden in the United States by USA Today’s “10 Best” Reader’s Choice Awards.

I could tell you about the blooming rhododendrons; the succulent and Mediterranean gardens; the walk by the sea where we watched in fascination as waves curled and broke, dashing themselves against rocks; the hummingbirds darting here and there...but instead I’ll let my photos show, not tell.


Enticing path

Blooming rhododendron





Tulip tree--I think it's a type of magnolia

Stalked aeonium


And so we come to the end of the Birds and Blooms and Winding Roads trip. It’s given me much happiness to relive this trip with you—thank you for joining me! I don’t know where my next everyday adventure will take me, but I’ll be sure to invite you along for the ride.

Where will your next everyday adventure take you?



California

Let There Be Lighthouses

April 30, 2018


Part Three of the Birds, Blooms, and Winding Roads Tour. Part one is here, part two is here. Click on photo to make it bigger.

One of our winding roads led us to Point Arena Lighthouse. Originally erected in 1870, it was destroyed by the 1906 San Francisco earthquake and rebuilt two years later. It’s the tallest lighthouse on the West Coast (115 feet), and you can climb to the top. (One other lighthouse, Pigeon Point, is the same height, but it’s not open to the public to climb.)

The area around Point Arena Lighthouse was spectacularly photogenic. We glanced at the lighthouse itself, snapped its photo, and spent the rest of our time there stalking birds and taking pictures of wildflowers, seals, and tossing waves.


Indian Paintbrush




After lunch and a wander through Mendocino:




We found ourselves at Point Cabrillo Light Station. Construction began in 1908, and the light was turned on for the first time on June 10, 1909. 

The lightstation

We didn’t see any whales or sea lions off the point, but we did see some wildlife:

White-crowned sparrow

California ground squirrel
Looking back toward the lightkeepers' houses from the lightstation

You can stay in the lightkeepers’ houses—I would love to do that. The views would be spectacular. 

Looking toward the lightstation from near the keepers' houses
Ocean near your front door

I was going to lump the Mendocino Coast Botanical Gardens into this post, but I think I’ll save it for later. You’re not tired of vacation photos yet, are you? (Don’t answer that!)